It’s easy to get discouraged when it seems like everyone else is having the luck. We trudge to and fro work and home, reminding ourselves along the way that we paid too much for our car, or we haven’t gotten a raise in three years, or the good ones are all taken. Why not me? we ask woefully. Because…we aren’t looking for the possibilities. Our perspective is limited and gone kind of stale. We need to see the world differently. But how? Here are 9 ways to freshen up your outlook.
Knowing what we want, like, need, or aspire to are positive forces that push us to push ourselves. To make our lives better.
But we also can stand in our own way by creating rules of won’t and don’t. “I won’t consider anything that involves doing math. “I don’t like that.” “I won’t ask her for help.” “I don’t think I’ll get a good response.” The more we won’t and don’t, the narrower our world becomes.
When we limit our possibilities like this, we can get stuck acting like a Tunnel Visionary. One of the best antidotes we know is to look at the situation differently. If you’re feeling judged, what does forgiveness look like? If you’re overwhelmed with work, what does success look like? Try these 9 ways to get a fresh perspective.
When we get unstuck, it’s because we are running on all cylinders, namely the four fundamental ways that we participate in the world: See, Believe, Think, Act (SBTA).
SBTA is not a magic recipe for success, but the results of consciously engaging these aspects of our behavior can feel magical. And joyful. And very, very encouraging.
On the other hand, any time we’re feeling stuck, it’s because one or more of these behaviors needs to be adjusted—what we call a gap.
A Seeing Gap is when we view the world or a situation as one of restriction instead of possibility. We tend to use the words “can’t,” “won’t,” and “don’t” when describing circumstances. Obstacles appear immovable or unchangeable, blocking any ray of hope. And it may seem like we’re on an endless journey of more-of-the-same.
In these instances, we’re acting like a Tunnel Visionary. Our view is limited to what isn’t working.
• “They won’t ever consider me for a promotion at work.”
• “I can’t get myself to the gym so I’m not going to lose weight.”
• “I don’t want to be in this relationship, but I don’t want to hurt anyone either.”
To shift our perspective to one of possibility, we need to stray from the usual. It could be taking in new sights for inspiration. It might be looking at the same old thing, but from a new vantage point that sparks our imagination. There are all sorts of ways we can widen our lens on life. And when we do, the answers to how we might move ahead in our career or start slimming down or change a relationship become visible to us.
Try out any of these 9 tips that help us see our world as one of possibility.